One of the most difficult aspects of "Life-Shifting" is letting go of an identity to which we have become accustomed, even attached... It feels like death... Not the real thing, perhaps, but in the moment, pretty darned close...
Truth is, we like to KNOW who we are at any given moment; we like to be comfortable with the role we are playing, and especially as humans, we desire to fulfill our desires desirously... Surely, this is true for many reasons, but one of the main ones, I think, is that making room for a new identity requires us to let go of an old one... And letting go in many ways resembles the experience of death... Even if it is just a little death, as Stephen Sondheim sings, "It is death nonetheless... Painful... Sad... Hard..."
But very necessary... How else can we welcome in the sense of possibility, the energy of creativity and spontaneity, if we don't step off the comfortable plateaus of identity that we build for ourselves? Sure, in moments when life suddenly shifts and doors open to new possibilities, it can feel exhilarating and fresh... But it can also feel terrifying and frightening, as we step out of our known frames of reference and dangle precariously in the unknown...
There are instances when we feel dejected and alone … when we find nothing as perfect and hopeful as it was sometime ago … there are times when we decide on giving in to the ambitions, and suddenly decide to give up on them … there are moments when we realise that being silent over an issue is better than to speak up and make them worse… there are moments when we stumble upon our own words and lose on our identity for the sake of that one soul …
We do a lot … a lot … and everything to just make things work… get the tough going … just to realise in the end that what we are upto… does not exist…
The life … halts again … but this time, it is not the one who you wished to be guided by… it is who you wished to enlighten your way… a death of your hope …
Life still has a long way to go … but at the moment, the road is engulfed by the darkest of times… while we sit in anticipation …
wonderful words hamza..
ReplyDeleteproud of u
keep it up !